it's just the end of a horrid day, not the end of life.

The past two days have been really tough for me. Pressure keeps on mounting. Stress level quickly rising. Frustration multiplying. (o, rhyming ah! :P)

For the longest time, I've convinced myself to always be positive no matter what, to see the glass as always half full, to believe that somewhere out there, someone's in a more hapless state and I am more fortunate. Optimism at it's fullest. It made me feel good, made me think there's more to life, made me believe that I can be stress free. It never failed. never ever.

But then, human as I am, I realized, I cannot not feel that I am fragile. Sometimes I cant help but give in, break down, think twice. There will always be a time when only a single choice is left - to stop, stop playing justice league-ish, stop not feeling the pain of the worst in life, stop believing that getting through anything unscathed is possible.

Right now, I seek to STOP. Stop, for a moment.

It's not like I'm super giving up. It's just that sometimes the world gets bigger and me, smaller, and smaller, and smaller. Negatives outweigh the positives. Failures defeat success. It's just tough you know, like college algebra tough. You poured your heart out, laid everything on the line, still, end up falling short. Just frustrating. Tiring.

I think I'll dwell in this state for quite some time. It's a must. But not too long I hope. I'll to try to convince myself to feel otherwise though. Slowly, I'll pick up from where I slipped and I'll get up, even stronger and less vulnerable. I will. I know I will.

As I've previously stated, it's just the end of a horrid day, not the end of life.

Just not, not yet...